(it’s the) story of my life

mary jessica hammes has been working on my story for babygooroo.com.

it’s finally up.  go over and have a read, even if you think you already know it by heart.

click here to read pumping through chemotherapy at babygooroo.com

ladies’ night

tonight, i’m going out with the ladies from our neighborhood for what they’ve aptly named “ladies’ night.”  i’ve been terribly depressed for a good while now, so hopefully this will provide me with a much needed, albeit short, mental respite.

it’s hard to blog when i’m depressed.  you can gauge my state of mind for yourself just by the frequency of my posts.

monday, i go back to inova loudoun for the week for my last dose of eshap chemo before my transplant.  no, cancer doesn’t get labor day off.

snap my life

it’s hard for me to blog wen i’m home from the hospital, have chemo brain and family staying with us to help.  so, this morning i snapped a bunch of garden pics for my twitter feed.  check those out here and follow me on twitter, subscribe to or watch my twitter feed, “tweet, tweet” on the sidebar when you’re waiting for me to blog.

i want a new drug

last night as i was n, my blood pressure skyrocketed and gave me the most horrible headache i have ever had in my entire life. no exaggeration, no dramatic hyperbole. the worst ever.

thankfully, they lowered my bp with meds and gave me some dilauded for the pain. i’m doing much better today, but it was indeed quite a scare. i seriously though my brain might explode.

third time’s a charm?

well, not exactly. just got the news that i’ll have to do a fourth chemo before my transplant. this is going to be a short post so i don’t swear a lot in front of my grandparents. ugh.

back in the saddle

i know, i know, i have been seriously blog-negligent. if you’re really getting desperate during one of my unforseen hiatuses, just check my twitter feed on the left sidebar under “tweet, tweet.” that should entertain you.

so, after nugget’s tantie left, her aunt katie and uncle “hibbip” (phillip) came for a visit. nuggetdaddy and i made it up for jenny’s show in alexandria. then my mom from florida came for her turn at casa de bits. nuggetdaddy and i both celebrated birthdays.

now, i’m back in the hospital enjoying a week of chemo, hopefully my last before my transplant. my pet scan was good. the report says “virtually no (cancer cell) activity,” that the site of involvement is “1/2 to 1/3 the size” from the previous scan and there is “comparably less (lymph) nodal involvement.”

i’ve just had 10mg of ambien, so i should be checking out soon. i’ll try to blog again in the morning. peace!

one more night

i just finished my last bag of chemo.  i should be discharged in the morning.  so far, no transfusion necessary.  i guess we’ll find out for certain tomorrow.

who needs sleep?

well, cancer patients for one.  and i finally got some last night courtesy of some ambien.  a little phenergan & ativan combo caught me a few more hours this morning. 

now i’m anxiously awaiting the arrival for my friend dr. t., who’s bringing me panera for lunch.

nuggetdaddy brought me z pizza yesterday and it was heavenly.  it was the first real food i’d eaten in days.

i’ve been getting visitors, but everyone seems to come at the same time, so i have lots of long drawn out periods of boredom. 

the steroid jitters are the worst of it this time, next being the nausea, but that’s fairly well controlled.  i might have to have a transfusion before i go home, whihc will likely be tomorrow, but today’s hemoglobin went up so maybe not!

nuggetdaddy is running all around the state of virginia today for work, so i will only get to see nugget once and not unitl this evening.  bummer.

you are my shining star

nugget and nuggetdaddy just left from their second visit today.  poor nugget is starting to get sad when she has to leave now.  ugh!   it just breaks my heart.  we try to focus her attention on going to see her friends and getting to eat a piece of candy once she gets in her carseat.  but, we can clearly see that she’s missing her mama a lot now.

my dear friend barbara visited me today.  she brought disney couture bracelets for nugget and me.  so sweet and just gorgeous (just like her)!

the steroids are really starting to get to me.  i have lots of nervous energy and have a hard time sitting still, despite the fact that i don’t exactly have loads of energy.  i had an ativan nap this afternoon and plan to have another one tonight with phenergan.

the nausea has really kicked in and my appetite is pretty much gone.  that’s okay though.  all i have to do is drink fluids.  i won’t be starving to death anytime soon.

okay, dear readers, that’s the best i can slap together for you right now.  have a good night!

oh well, here we are again

this afternoon i was admitted to loudoun hospital for my second dose of eshap chemotherapy.  i’m trying my best to stay focused and positive, and not get dragged down by the knowledge of what’s to come.

nugget and nuggetdaddy are here with me the entire week this time.  they are staying with our amazing friends, kristie and brian,and their two little girls who live super close to the hospital, again.  i am so thankful to have such awesome friends and happy that nugget will have “the other mommy” to look after her. 

it’s really challenging being an ap mama while trapped in the hospital.  were he in the room, nuggetdaddy would remind me that that’s what daddies are for.  i’m so lucky to have a partner in parenting that shares the same goals and ideals as me.  i know staying at home would be easier for him.  i’m glad he’s got not only nugget’s, but my best interest at heart.

i’m too scatterbrained at the moment to write a long “yeah me!” post, so you’ll have to check back after the drugs kick in.

peace!