You are currently browsing the monthly archive for October 2008.



bleomycin toxicity appears to be the real culprit behind the fever.  the pneumonia they thought i might have had is actually pneumonitis.  it’s basically the same thing, pneumonia being caused by infection while pneumonitis is not.


the treatment is steroids, solumedrol in my case.  i’m getting it in my iv for now and will switch to pills once i go home.





i’m still on antibiotics, levaquin, as a precaution, though all of my blood cultures have been coming back negative.








right now i have to use extra oxygen to get up out of bed.  hopefully, i’ll be breathing easier once the steroids are in full effect.










i’m terribly sad to be missing trick-or-treating with the nugget.  nugget daddy will bring her here to get ready and maybe we’ll do a few laps around the nurses’ station before they head off to the halloween event at the mall.  it’s going to be a little too cold for nugget to go door-to-door in her tinker bell costume, so the mall it is.










we’re hoping i’ll be well enough to leave the hospital this weekend.  nugget’s grandmamie has been here taking care of her, and nugget daddy and i couldn’t be anymore grateful for all of her help.  i’ll still need a lot of help once i’m back home, but i’m sure we’ll manage to work something out.


we’re anxious to see the progress on the new house.  all the flooring is in, as are the cabinets, sinks, tubs, and granite counters.  toilets and faucets should be in soon, if not already and appliance installation has started. 

we’ve ordered all of the appliances that we chose not to buy from the builder and have almost all  of the lighting fixtures now, too.  we definitely weren’t spending our money with the builder on those selections.



we have crocus bulbs to throw down under the sod as it goes down.  i’m hoping to be well enough to do it myself.  they’ll make a spectaular addition to our lawn in winter as the first early sign of spring.


i won’t be leaving the hospital anytime soon.  i did get to see nugget yesterday, finally, so that made a world of difference.  nugget daddy is supposed to bring her by again this morning after gymboree. 

i hope more people decide to come visit.  it’s getting really, really boring here and the tv remote only goes in one direction.


very early sunday i woke up with a fever of 103.9.  my oncologist had me admitted to the hospital that morning. 

i have pneumonia, though of what type they’re not yet certain.  immunosuppressed patients don’t exhibit symptoms the way an otherwise healthy one would.  i have no telltale cough, just a fever that gets really high.  they’re doing lots of tests and once my fever is under control i should be able to go home. 

this is definitely going to disrupt my chemo schedule, about which i’m none too happy.  it shouldn’t push it back more that a few days.  my oncologist thinks it will be less than a week.

i’m really tired and very medicated, but i wanted to get something up here!  i’ll try to keep you posted, and in timely fashion.


harvest napkin ties








 i’m making these harvest napkin ties right now. my dear friend michelle has sucked me into some serious acorn crafting this season.




my in the fight t-shirt from stand up to cancer finally arrived yesterday and is in the washer right now! i’m looking forward to wearing the hell out of it over the next month and then moving on to another one. perhaps one like this?

a woman i used to work with messaged me on myspace this week.  i read it yesterday and it absolutely made my day, which i might add was spectacularly craptastic up until then.

“i started working at magic kingdom back in 1997 and only partially knew who you were. you were always cool to me at town square and spectromagic and stuff, but we were only acquaintances.

i happened upon your page through mikki and started reading your blog, “bits of myself,” and i cannot help being taken by how fucking amazing you are.   sorry for the language from someone you do not know, but i can’t think of any other words.   i don’t even remember where i started the “bits,” but i backed up to where you found out you had cancer. by the time i got to your final breastfeeding with nugget, there were uncontrollable tears streaming down my face at how you kept apologizing to her, for something that you did not ask for.

i don’t know how much all of this means coming from someone you don’t know, but i just had to get this out.  i was driving day parade floats when you were at mk with your baby girl, and i saw you two days in a row.   knowing how painful it must be, there you stood in the sun, in a tank top, bald… smiling and waving.

i hope i didn’t weird you out with all this, but know that you have touched one more individual’s life.  you are the strongest woman that i don’t know.”

i just needed to thank you for that and let you know that your kind words have touched my heart.  thank you for reading my blog.  and thank you to all of you who continue to do so.  i hope you’ll all stay tuned for the exciting conclusion to this chapter of my life.


chemo is kicking my ass this week and i’m still exhausted from traveling.  here’s your first installment of vacation photos, though.  you’ve been waiting so patiently… sort of.  i know it’s been hard.  enjoy!


dinner at chef mickey's

our magical moment



dear assclown,

thanks for smashing the window on my car.  that’s just what we needed this week!  were you looking for our garmin?  we keep that inside, dumbass.  did the alarm scare you off?  is that why you didn’t take anything?  i hope you got glass in your eyes.

fuck you very much,

the pissed off car owner who has cancer, you jackass


so, i was thinking about posting this letter around our apartment complex and maybe taping it to the windows of my car.

i really have so many more fun and interesting stories and photos to share with you from our florida trip, the new house, the new wigs, but first i have to get through tomorrow’s chemo (dose #9 of 12 or cycle 5, dose #1) and this weekend’s trip to houston for nuggetdaddy’s brother’s wedding.  and, yes, we’ll be taking the garmin with us.

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